Have you ever wanted to spend time with God…and somehow never gotten around to it? Building a consistent quiet time isn’t usually about finding more time.
Maybe you planned to get up a little earlier. Maybe you carried your Bible to the kitchen table with your coffee or left it open on the counter the night before. You had every intention of spending a few quiet minutes with the Lord before the day got moving.
But then life happened.
An email needed an answer. The dog wanted out. You remembered something you forgot to do yesterday. Before long, the morning had slipped away, and your quiet time slowly disappeared with it.
I’ve had many days exactly like that, but what puzzled me wasn’t that I was skipping my quiet time. It was why.
I love Jesus. I believe Scripture changes us. I’ve experienced God’s faithfulness too many times to count. So why did spending time with Him sometimes feel like one more thing I needed to fit into an already full day?
The more I paid attention, the more I noticed something surprising.
The mornings I skipped my quiet time usually weren’t the busiest mornings. They were the mornings I just wasn’t looking forward to it.
That realization stopped me.
When Quiet Time Becomes Another Task
Why wasn’t I looking forward to spending time with the God I love?
The answer had very little to do with God.
Somewhere along the way, quiet time had slowly become another task on my to-do list. Read my Bible. Pray. Journal. Move on with the day.
I never consciously decided to think about it that way, and I don’t think most of us do. It happens gradually. We start measuring ourselves by consistency, chapters read, reading plans completed, or how early we got out of bed. Before long, what began as a relationship starts feeling a little more like a routine we’re trying to maintain.
And honestly…
Who gets excited about another obligation?
I wonder if that’s why so many of us struggle to build a consistent quiet time. It isn’t because we don’t love God. It’s because we’ve unintentionally started approaching time with Him the same way we approach everything else we need to accomplish.
The Question That Changed Everything
For years, I kept asking the wrong question.
How can I become more disciplined?
There’s nothing wrong with discipline. In fact, every healthy relationship requires some intentionality. But the more I focused on becoming disciplined, the more my quiet time started feeling like another item on my to-do list.
Then one day I found myself wondering something completely different.
Why don’t I look forward to this?
That question uncovered something I hadn’t seen before.
Somewhere along the way, I had stopped thinking of quiet time as time with God. Instead, I thought of it as something I needed to accomplish before I could move on with my day.
And relationships don’t work that way.
Think about the people you love most. No two conversations are exactly alike.
Some are deep. Others are lighthearted. Sometimes you spend hours together. Other times it’s a quick phone call just to check in. The relationship isn’t measured by whether every interaction looks the same. It’s built over time through simply showing up and spending time together.
Why had I come to expect my relationship with God to be any different?
Quiet Time Is a Relationship, Not a Routine
Once I realized that, my expectations began to change.
I stopped trying to make every quiet time look the same.
Some mornings I spend twenty minutes in a single chapter because one verse won’t let me move on. Other mornings I write more than I read. Sometimes I linger in prayer. Sometimes I simply sit with my coffee and ask,
“Lord, what do You want me to notice today?”
I’ve learned that healthy relationships have rhythms.
There are seasons of long conversations and seasons of quiet companionship. There are days when you have a lot to say and days when you simply enjoy being together.
I think we’ve unintentionally convinced ourselves that a “good” quiet time always follows the same formula: read enough, pray enough, check the box, and move on.
But that’s not how relationships grow.
They grow because we keep showing up. Sometimes we talk. Sometimes we listen. Sometimes we simply enjoy being together.
Ironically, once I stopped trying to complete my quiet time, I became far more consistent with it.
Not because I lowered the importance of Scripture.
Because I stopped trying to accomplish something and started looking forward to spending time with Someone.
What Changed When I Stopped Treating My Quiet Time Like a Task
I’ve also noticed something else.
When I begin the day with God, I carry less mental noise into everything that follows.
The emails are still waiting. The laundry still needs folding. Unexpected interruptions still happen. My schedule doesn’t magically clear itself because I opened my Bible that morning.
But my perspective changes.
I’m reminded that I don’t have to hold everything together because God already is.
That may be one of the greatest gifts of a quiet time. It doesn’t remove every problem you’ll face that day, and it doesn’t promise a day without interruptions.
It simply reminds you Who you’re walking into those interruptions with.
Mary, Martha, and the Better Choice
One of my favorite stories is found in Luke 10.
Martha was busy serving while Mary sat at Jesus’ feet. Jesus didn’t criticize Martha because she was working hard. He simply reminded her that Mary had chosen what was better.
I think about that story often.
I wonder if we’re sometimes a little like Martha during our quiet time. We’re so focused on reading enough, praying enough, or doing it the “right” way that we forget why we came in the first place.
Jesus didn’t invite us into another daily assignment.
He invited us into a relationship.
Why Consistency Became Easier
I still miss a morning once in a while.
Life doesn’t always go according to plan, and there are still days when my quiet time gets crowded out by everything else competing for my attention.
The difference isn’t that I’ve become perfectly consistent.
It’s that I no longer feel like I’ve failed.
Instead, I find myself missing that time with God the way you miss catching up with a good friend. Not because you’re checking a box, but because you genuinely enjoy being together.
For me, that’s been one of the biggest changes of all.
A Final Thought
If your quiet time has started feeling more like another responsibility than a relationship, maybe don’t begin by trying to become more disciplined. Begin by remembering who is waiting for you.
Somewhere along the way, I stopped asking, “How can I be more consistent?” Instead, I started looking forward to spending time with God again.
Ironically, that’s when consistency became much easier.
If you’re wondering what that actually looks like in everyday life, I’d love to share a little more.
Keep Growing
If this post resonated with you, here are a few others that continue the conversation:
- What My Quiet Time Actually Looks Like (And Why It Changed) – A behind-the-scenes look at how my quiet time has changed through different seasons of life.
- Why Do So Many Quiet Times Start with Good Intentions…but Never Seem to Last? – The mindset shift that helped me stop chasing the “perfect” routine and build one that lasts.
And if you’re looking for a simple place to begin again, I’d love to invite you to download my free 5-Day Prayer Reset.